Prenuptial Agreements
Congratulations on your upcoming wedding!
The idea of negotiating a prenuptial agreement during wedding planning can feel disheartening. Let’s be honest, having to think about and discuss the worst-case scenario while preparing for the happily-ever-after can be difficult and is not exactly romantic. The notion can even provoke suspicious thoughts and raise questions which force a couple to contemplate the end of the relationship rather than focus on its future. Throw finances into the mix, and words like “mistrust and “greed” pop into your head while writing your wedding vows, making the “I do” feel more like a “do I?”
Alas, the prevalent misconception that prenuptial agreements are designed to deprive a spouse of assets is unfortunate. This is because every person entering a marriage in New Jersey is bound by the prenuptial agreement imposed upon them by New Jersey law.
The idea of negotiating a prenuptial agreement during wedding planning can feel disheartening. Let’s be honest, having to think about and discuss the worst-case scenario while preparing for the happily-ever-after can be difficult and is not exactly romantic. The notion can even provoke suspicious thoughts and raise questions which force a couple to contemplate the end of the relationship rather than focus on its future. Throw finances into the mix, and words like “mistrust and “greed” pop into your head while writing your wedding vows, making the “I do” feel more like a “do I?”
Alas, the prevalent misconception that prenuptial agreements are designed to deprive a spouse of assets is unfortunate. This is because every person entering a marriage in New Jersey is bound by the prenuptial agreement imposed upon them by New Jersey law.
Everyone has a prenuptial agreement when they get married; the question is whether it is one that is imposed upon them or the one they discussed and agreed to with complete disclosure.
A prenuptial agreement is an effective tool to accomplish many different objectives. The most obvious one is more control over the potential end of the marriage and avoiding a costly, contentious divorce in the future. What you would “get” in a divorce has to be evaluated in the context of the legal fees you would pay to an attorney in the process.
But it is not the obvious objectives that render people uneasy about the idea of negotiating or signing a prenuptial agreement. What the two of you may agree is fair today may not be what either of you would feel is fair years from now. Circumstances change. And while this thought may instill apprehension in you vis-à-vis the idea of a prenup, it is exactly the reason a comprehensive, thoughtful and detailed prenuptial agreement can bring more predictability and peace of mind. The alternative is that the outcome will be determined based on laws you may not be familiar with or that may change, affected by factors you did not anticipate, and affected by the amount of money either one of you is willing to spend on legal fees fighting until the other acquiesces.
But it is not the obvious objectives that render people uneasy about the idea of negotiating or signing a prenuptial agreement. What the two of you may agree is fair today may not be what either of you would feel is fair years from now. Circumstances change. And while this thought may instill apprehension in you vis-à-vis the idea of a prenup, it is exactly the reason a comprehensive, thoughtful and detailed prenuptial agreement can bring more predictability and peace of mind. The alternative is that the outcome will be determined based on laws you may not be familiar with or that may change, affected by factors you did not anticipate, and affected by the amount of money either one of you is willing to spend on legal fees fighting until the other acquiesces.
It is only when you understand that reality that you can possibly have a chance of seeing beyond the undeniably negative stigma of a prenup to appreciate its benefits, whether you are asked to sign one or whether you wish to negotiate one.
If you need help proposing a prenuptial agreement, understanding the implications of a prenuptial agreement your future spouse proposed, or if you are looking to retain a mediator to help you and your future spouse negotiate a prenuptial agreement, schedule a consultation by clicking here.